Tuesday, 21 May 2013

OOTW-Week 11- "Only know you love her when you let her go, and you let her go"

After a few weeks of being back home it still hasn't sunk in that my first year of university is finally complete. I'm starting to feel regulated now by having a routine of work, although I miss the hustle and bustle of uni life. It's too quiet and calm whereas I'm so used to the noise and the manic spur of the moment events that occurred. I do really miss Southampton; my girls and the shopping (of course) and also the independence I had there, I'll be returning soon though sure enough. Here are my outfits of the week:




























Top Left: A lounging day at home I wore- Off the shoulder jumper from Hollister, Aztec print shorts from Topshop and Tights from Primark.
Top Right: An evening out with the family I wore- Cord patterned blazer from Primark, Scallop vest top from Topshop and Checked treggings from Topshop.
Bottom Left: My last day in Southampton I wore- Denim shirt from Primark, Skull printed vest top from Topshop, Leggings from Topshop and All star trainers from Converse.
Bottom Right: My last night out in Southampton I wore- Carousel printed blouse from Minnies Boutique, Lace crop top from River Island, Disco pants from River Island and Tassel heels also from River Island.

Thursday, 16 May 2013

Insecurities

Usually you'd expect me to write something regarding fashion right now, but for a change this is something different. I love making my blog more diverse by adding my own personal elements to it and making it my own.

They say insecurtites can make you or break you- you either face your fear or let it haunt you forever. Everyone has something about themselves or something they are insecure about, especially me. I like to try and hide what scares me the most behind a smile, as I believe your insecurities are something so personal to you. They're something that can stop you from being happy or even prevent you from achieving something within your life. "Always wear your heart on your sleeve" that's what they say- but doesn't that show a sense of weakness sometimes? Knowing someone can see and feel how much emotion you have towards them or something within your life. However it can show a sense of confidence and passion towards someone that your not afraid to embrace.

One of my biggest insecurities may seem like something so stereotypical, but to me it's something that prevents me from showing my emotion. If your a regular reader of my blog you would've seen my last post "Oh if you could see me now" talking about the absense of my dad within my life. Having such a female orienated growing up seemed normal and taught me alot. I learned heartbreak from my sister and the stress of being a lone parent from my mum- so I felt as though I grew an immunity from the pain after seeing it first hand, I was wrong.

Not having that dominant male role model within my life I find it difficult to open up or even get close to another male, as I believe they are just gonna either walk away or hurt me in the end. It's a bad way to look on life, but when that one important man in my life couldn't and wouldn't stick around then why should another?

I learnt from my family to put everyone else before yourself, peoples happiness and positivity made them happy, regardless what they were feeling. The one time I began to open up and slowly grew to know someone I had it thrown back at me like it was worthless- as if I had disappointed or hurt them. But I hadn't, they just hurt me out of their own stupidity and insecurity knowing I would just continue how we were, and stupidly I did. They never believed in a good thing happening to them, so when they had something good they had to break it to see the pain. I wanted to show we could work through it and piece the puzzle back together- but when the pieces of a different jigsaw are brought together its innevitable that it can never be fixed.

Putting your heart,soul and yourself into someone is a massive thing for anyone to give away- to show yourself off like a piece of art for people to judge you. Opinions will be made, jealousy maybe created or even that sense of emotion that can influence someone inside.

Insecurities aren't there to break you down, they're there for you to learn and slowly grow from previous experiences. To show you a different way of dealing with certain situations, and not make you feel as though it's your fault or who you are. Never change yourself to be more like someone else to deal with your insecurity- this is what I learnt. Trying to act confident when your so self conscious will just cause more pain, as that's not who your made to be. Everyone is different in their own beautiful way, the way you deal with things says alot about you and your heart. So what if you get scared over the tiniest thing, that shows your heart, your emotion and your inner insecurity. Insecurities are like a goal that only you yourself can work to find out the route to understand them, people may stand in your way and cause some obstacles, but only you will find a way to tackle their doubts from your path.

" No matter how much you give people, no matter how kind you are to people they are always looking for a clown. Sometimes you have to be the clown, but there's no shame in it. " Emeli Sande

Tuesday, 14 May 2013

Pattern clash alert featuring Barry M and Maybelline

Finally after all the stress, late nights and the lack of sleep my first year of university is complete! YES! To say I'm relieved is an understatement but I still have to await my final grades to see if I've made it into my second year. Although after returning back home now for the summer it feels so strange, especially not being: woken up at different hours of the night from the noise, the fire alarm going off or people coming in from a night out. It's silent, pure bliss what anyone wants- but it is so surreal. Unfortunetly I wasn't able to pack everything into my three suitcases I brought home, they all contained clothes and jewellery, so my nail varnishes were left behind. Que me buying more- my addiction for nail varnishes gets worse and worse. Here are my latest nail varnish purchases:

 Maybelline Color Show Polka Dots in Speckled Pink
 Barry M Pink Sapphire Glitter
 Barry M on the thumb and ring finger
With patterns and neon being a big trend for this Spring/Summer this is the perfect way to stand out from the crowd and perfect for any festival. All you need is two coats of each polish and that's it, so easily to apply and doesn't take long at all to dry. Probably my favourite nail polishes I've brought in a long time! And with all makeup and beauty products being 3 for 2 at Superdrug it's definitely worth popping down!

Barry M Pink Sapphire Glitter: £2.99
Maybelline Speckled Pink: £2.99

Sunday, 5 May 2013

OOTW-Week 10- "I need your love, I need your time"

It seems the sunshine is here to stay, finger crossed- with good weather comes the excitement of summer finally beginning. Although with two more big assignments left I'm not thinking about summer just yet otherwise I'll go off on a tangent and avoid the amount of work I still have left. With only a few days now till the end of first year it's clear that summer is just round the corner for me. But before that the uni work NEEDS to be done, so maybe I should switch off Hollyoaks and continue where I left off. Here are my favourite outfits of the week:





Top Left: Black off the shoulder dress worn as a top from Asos, Cross necklace from Primark, Blazer from Primark, Distressed boyfriend jeans from Primark and Brogues from New Look.
Top Right: Mickey mouse crop top from Topshop, Checked treggings from Topshop and Heels from River Island.
Bottom Left: Laced collared dress from Topshop
Bottom Right: Black midi dress from Boohoo, Denim jacket and trainers as before.

Hope your enjoying your bank holiday weekend!

Friday, 3 May 2013

OOTD- " Let the sun shine"

Sunshine makes everything better; the views, peoples moods and the occasional stroll here and there. With my first year of university slowly coming to an end in 10 days (where have the past few months gone?!) the stress of the amount of work I still have to do is mentally draining me. As it's bank holiday you'd expect with this weather me to be in a beer garden with my favourites just relaxing, but instead I'll be in the library or in my room finishing off my last two units. Wish me luck, here's my outfit of the day:






Denim Jacket: New Look
Black Love T-shirt: Love Label
Spiked Necklace: Primark
Grey Treggings: Topshop
Trainers: Converse

Enjoy your bank holiday!